15 JunReflections on Self-Development and Self-Care by Dr. Konstantin Lukin, Ph.D. In the age of COVID-19, self-isolation, and inevitable uncertainty, the topics of self- development and self-care have come up for my patients more than they might have in “normal life.” (What’s even normal anymore? While we are all staying home, we may have fewer obligations, or more time to fill. Simultaneously, we may be attempting to distract ourselves from all the bad news surrounding us, easing our inevitable anxiety, or trying to use this time to better ourselves in some way. These goals all hold some importance on a case-to-case basis, but it’s important to accurately distinguish between two similar but different ideas here: self-development and self-care. Self-care is just that — doing something to take care of yourself. It may include a relaxing activity like yoga, a bath, reading a book, or something that helps someone else clear their mind, like going for a walk outside. Self-care is a practice that aims to help self-soothe but may look different for every person. For example, someone may consider watching a favorite TV show to be self-care, while for someone else, this might not feel like self-care, and more so represent them falling off of their self-care regimen that includes showering, making a cup of coffee, and chatting with a spouse. There is no blanket example of self-care, but there are certain goals it should ideally fulfill. Self-care should be deliberate. It should be something you plan to do for the sole goal of taking care of yourself, and nothing else. At the same time, self-care should hopefully make you feel a little bit better during or afterward. Self-care should aim to improve your emotional well-being, and therefore elicit positive emotions rather than negative. If you try something as a practice of self-care and it doesn’t feel good, try something else! Read the Full Article on Psychology Today Author Dr. Konstantin Lukin, Ph.D. Dr. Konstantin Lukin is a psychologist, author, speaker, and researcher specializing in men’s issues, couple’s counseling, and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). He is the Director and Co-Founder of the Lukin Center, northern New Jersey’s premiere evidence-based psychotherapy practice. The Lukin Center emphasizes evidence-based treatments such as emotion-focused therapy for couples, and cognitive and dialectical behavioral therapies for children, adolescents, and adults. Since its inception, the Lukin Center has grown to include testing and assessment as well as medication management services. As a therapist, Dr. Lukin focuses on providing support and practical feedback to help clients effectively address personal life challenges. He integrates complementary modalities and techniques – including cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), schema-focused therapy, and emotion-focused therapy (EFT) – to offer a personalized approach tailored to each client. With compassion and understanding, he works with his clients to help them build on their strengths and attain the personal growth to which they are committed. Dr. Lukin has extensive experience in private practice, conducting outpatient therapy with children, adolescents, and adults. He also has extensive clinical and research experience with people of all ages and their families, including those diagnosed as severely and persistently mentally ill, in both inpatient and outpatient settings. He has co-led groups for children, adolescents, and adults diagnosed with OCD in an outpatient setting. He is trained and experienced in administering a variety of psychological test batteries including neuropsychological, cognitive, and personality assessments, and he has conducted diagnostic and intake interviews and prepared evaluation reports. Dr. Lukin is a graduate of the Honors College at SUNY at Stony Brook, and earned his doctorate from Fairleigh Dickinson University.
